Even though we have all been through it, describing the teenage experience is difficult. This is because we don’t have many words or concepts that accurately carry the depth of expression required. In the absence of such a descriptor, one of the most common expressions is, perhaps, that of a rollercoaster. This seems fair because a rollercoaster tends to illustrate the significant ups and downs of puberty and adolescence. However, earlier this week, I was given the best representation, thus far, of teenage life by one of my good friends, Abhishikth Babu: weather.

If the stability of adult culture can be explained as “climate,” that of youth culture is “weather.” Climate is primarily unvarying: hot, mild, cold, tropical, arctic, humid—we know what those terms generally mean, and climate takes years to change in any substantial manner.

But the weather is different. Weather is volatile and turbulent—sunny one day, rainy the next; warm in the sun, cold in the shade; there’s hail, snow, sleet, heatwaves, droughts, and flash floods. The weather is anything but unvarying.

Parents, your world can mainly be defined in terms of climate. You have a relatively stable understanding of what happens each day, very little comes as a surprise, but if something “pops up,” you have the wisdom and experience to deal with it.

Climatologists require a 30-year record of daily weather before designating the recurring patterns as “climate.” In much the same way, parents have 30 years of life experience before they begin to settle into their own climate. The challenge is to remember this when dealing with your children, who have a 40% chance of social and emotional thunderstorms on any given day. In other words, they will have surprise storms that they don’t have the experience to handle. Unfortunately, you cannot shield them from all of these storms. If you try, you end up creating an entirely different set of problems. So, this means that you must learn how to react to their issues in a healthy, calming manner. If their weather affects your climate, you’re both going to be in for some violent climate change.

Here are some tips:
1. Be present.
2. Listen.
3. Be slow to anger.
4. Don’t fuel the storms.

Please don’t allow your teen’s weather to change your climate. Be the stability they need.

Please be hesitant to label your teen’s storms as climate. When you do so, you provide them an excuse to ignore learning how to cope.

Please weather the storms well.

Fathers, don’t provoke your children to wrath. -Eph. 6:4
Mothers, open your mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on your tongue. –Prov. 31:26
Children, obey your parents. -Eph. 6:1